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if you didn’t know may was national masturbation month, you’re not alone—nor are you even necessarily catholic. the annual observance doesn’t have a hugely high profile. it started in 1995 in—where else?—san francisco, as a response to the forced resignation of u.s. surgeon general joycelyn elders. after a speech at the united nations world aids day in 1994, an audience member asked elders about masturbation’s potential for discouraging early sexual activity. she replied: “i think [it] is something that is part of human sexuality and a part of something that perhaps should be taught.” that was the end of the first black surgeon general’s washington career, but the beginning of national masturbation month, a protest effort started by the company good vibrations. source wtf i had no idea
keith olbermann responds to bush’s non-response to bill clinton. he goes over his first months in office leading up to 9/11.
jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, bob. so they loaded up jack's minivan and headed north. after driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. so they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night. "i realize it's terrible weather out there and i have this huge house all to myself, but i'm recently widowed," she explained. "i'm afraid the neighbors will talk if i let you stay in my house." "don't worry," jack said. "we'll be happy to sleep in the barn. and if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light." the lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. they enjoyed a great weekend of skiing. but about nine months later, jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. it took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had meet on the ski weekend. he dropped in on his friend bob and asked, "bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?" "yes, i do." said bob. "did you, err, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?" "well, um, yes," bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, "i have to admit that i did." "and did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?" bob's face turned beet red and he said, "yeah, look, i'm sorry, buddy. i'm afraid i did." "why do you ask?" "she just died and left me everything."
stare if you care
michael holmes reports on what life is like in iraq. included: bombings in markets and at universities; attacks on civilians and military troops.
that is quite a child in her!
read the title.
you are all welcome to join bacon eater's anonymous.
a little estonian vocab lesson for you all.
a video made from the headlines of the first month of the "war on terror" first month of the "war on terror" (tm) the rush to judgement for the 911 attacks and the branding of the "war on terror" is atonishing when looking back on it. it also reminds us that the taliban only wanted evidence that bin laden was involved in the attacks, the us refused to give this evidence and so far has refused to release any real hard evidence. colin powell announced he would release evidence linking bin laden to 911, just before the anthrax attacks that diverted everyones attention.
joliet, ill. — drowsy spectators in one suburban chicago courtroom might want to stifle their yawns from now on. clifton williams, 33, of richton park, is facing six months in jail for making what court documents call a yawn-like sound in will county judge daniel rozak's court last month. the yawn happened as williams' cousin, jason mayfield, was being sentenced for a drug charge on july 23. rozak found williams in contempt of court and sentenced him to six months in jail. however, rozak could free williams after a status hearing thursday, if williams apologizes and the judge accepts. by then, williams will have served 21 days. witnesses disagree about whether williams' yawn was out of line. charles pelkie, spokesman for the will county state's attorney's office, said the prosecutor in the courtroom at the time told him that what came out of williams' mouth could hardly be called a "yawn." "this was a very loud, boisterous, deliberate attempt on the part of this individual to disrupt the proceedings and show disrespect to the court," pelkie said. "it was not a guy who involuntarily yawned. this guy was making a statement — a very loud statement — in court." mayfield disagreed, saying it was "not an outrageous yawn." williams has written his family to say that he can't believe he's in jail "for nothing." a message left for rozak tuesday was not immediately returned. six months is the maximum sentence judges can give for criminal contempt without a jury trial. source
muncie, indiana (ap) -- a man was sentenced to 18 months in prison after admitting that he forced his 7-year-old daughter to kill the family cat by holding a knife in her hand and making her stab the pet. "i am extremely sorry for what i did," danield j. collins said during his sentencing thursday. "everything is my responsibility." collins, 39, pleaded guilty to a felony count of animal cruelty and two felony counts of neglect of a dependent. in exchange, prosecutors dropped three other felony charges. "this is not civilized conduct," judge robert barnet jr. said as he sentenced collins. under the plea agreement, collins must receive counseling and attend parenting classes and substance abuse treatment. the judge also prohibited collins from owning a pet. collins was arrested march 13 after police said he forced his daughter to stab boots, the family's 8-month-old cat. the girl and collins' 11-year-old son said their father ordered them to stab the cat because he wanted them to "learn to kill." police said the boy tried to hide the cat from his father, but collins found the animal and strangled it as his children watched. collins said he was intoxicated at the time and remembered little about what happened that day. deputy prosecutor judi calhoun said she was outraged by the crime but agreed to the plea deal so that the children would not have to testify against their father. defense attorney steve bruce said collins, a navy veteran, has no previous felony convictions. source image above: not of actual kitty.
the company that paid a man more than $37,000 to tattoo its logo on his head is hitting new heights. this time, the company that makes snorestop is paying a man to live atop a billboard for one month, starting monday (nov. 14).
jamie king, a 41-year-old tobacco store owner from fredericksburg, virginia, will have to eat, sleep and answer the call of nature in front of the town of columbia, south carolina, where the billboard will be positioned.
but king won’t have it that rough: businesses have donated a portable toilet, exercise bike, and recliner, among other things, to help king pass the time.
he jokes, “i always knew i’d make it to the top, and i finally have.”
king’s paycheck could reach as much as $1 million based on the online sales generated from the stunt, but he says he plans to donate half of his money to the special operations warrior foundation and use the remaining share for other charitable deeds.
flash news
these clips are just plain hilarious!
for everyone that's had to deal with idiot co-workers or just plain idiots. john is a very crafty man when it comes to solving work-related problems and you can't take that away from him. ever.
blame it on the ah ah ah ah alcohol
husky from other videos, now at one year, catching treat from her nose.
article submitted by blizzloader. time travel could be a reality within just three months, russian mathematicians have claimed. they believe an experiment nuclear scientists plan to carry out in underground tunnels in geneva in may could create a rift in the fabric of the universe. the european organisation for nuclear research (cern) hopes its "atom-smashing" tests - which aim to recreate the conditions in the first billionth of a second after the "big bang'" created everything - will shed invaluable light on the origins of the universe. but irina aref'eva and igor volovich, of moscow's steklov mathematical institute, say the energy produced by forcing tiny particles to collide at close to the speed of light could open the door to visitors from the future. according to einstein's general theory of relativity, any large amounts of matter or energy will distort the space and time that surrounds it. if the energy or mass is large enough, it is claimed that time can be distorted so much that it folds back on itself - creating a wormhole, or time tunnel, between the present and the future. but dr brian cox, a member of cern and one of britain's leading experts in particle physics, is highly sceptical about the russian claims, calling them "nothing more than a good science fiction story". he said: "cosmic ray collisions in the upper atmosphere are far more energetic than anything we can produce. "they have been occurring for five billion years, and no time travellers have appeared. "stephen hawking has suggested that any future theory of quantum gravity will probably close this possibility off, not least because the universe usually proceeds in a sane way, and time travel into the past isn't sane." cynics often point out that if time travel was really possible, we would have been visited by people from the future. however, einstein's laws of physics suggest that time travel is only possible into the past as far as the point when the first time machine was invented. source
now when someone says that you have the intelligence of a child, you can take it as a compliment.
just so you all know :p
